Sry I called you an 8
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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