she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
