quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
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