I must be too annoying 4 u.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words: eviction party
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize