wakey wakey hands off snakey
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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