Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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