I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
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Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize