Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
