sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
