Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
