are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize