who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
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