I am in a vortex of obligation.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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