ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize