i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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