Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
