Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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