my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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