I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
No subtext here. People are naked.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
