Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
