My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
so much tequila, so little girl.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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