We're facebook friends in real life
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
