Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize