When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i dont even know how to be here
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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