i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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