I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
