i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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