y did u give ur computer a hand job?
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
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