Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
