tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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