so let's talk penis.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official drugs can't kill me
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I think i got beer on your cat.
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