ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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