dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize