i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
