you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
