Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
