I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
