best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
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