I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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