You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
