I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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