I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize