im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize