spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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