i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize
