i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
