I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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