i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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