it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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