she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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